I would like it back now. Today was just another LONG day. Someone a while ago posted that short weeks really aren't short, you just do five days of work in four. This week is like that.

Sigh, without my running buddy it's just too damned easy to say I'll run tomorrow. Now, at least my new pilates class is tomorrow. Oh, I didn't tell you about that? Okay, backing up.

A month ago I had had it with my flabby body. No, not true, TWO months ago I had had it with my flabby body. Six weeks ago I found an unpretentious pilates studio in Allston (near Sunset, oh the irony right?) four weeks ago I finally got the guts to go. It is right up my alley. My instructor has a full tattooed sleeve down one arm, is a woman wrestler, and oh yeah, is about four months pregnant. She's lovely. The classes are much faster than my previous ones. Still and hour long we're moving our bodies faster. Which is good and bad at the same time.

SO - that's my Thrusday. I leave work, hike over to the student ghetto and then hop the bus get home at about 7:30 and realize just how hard I worked out. Seriously the stairs are hard for me.

Wednesdays have been running with Jen for about a month too. We've gotten the 3 mile loop from Watertown Square to Brighton and back down to about 30 mins give or take. And we added Sundays to combat the 'I don't wanna go to work' blues. I am seeing a difference. My not so much on the scale, although it is going down too, but more in my pants. Thank goodness too, the only way I am going to go out and buy more pants is if they are in a smaller size.

But back to my now problem. Jen is laid up a bit for a time, and as much as she misses running I NEED her to run. Okay I don't need her, but Jen knocking on my door at 5:30 makes me go way more than getting home at 6:30 knowing Kevin's right behind me and we need 12 million things at the store is a really good excuse not to go. But I've got to go. It's the only thing that works and let's me feel how I want to rather than how I do now.

I would like to figure out how to stop the excuses and get my buttocks in gear with or without my running buddy, who obviously I miss terribly.

...until you get it.

I apparently don't suck as much as I thought I do. Several opportunities have fallen in my lap in the last week, reminding me that people like working with me and that I am not as bad at things as I perhaps think.

It's hard to put into words. I know now, I have some work to do, in several areas in my life.

Kevin: Ugh, my bald spot is getting bigger.
Fran: So what! You know so is my ass. Look, they're both behind us so we can't see them!

For once in my life I had my husband in stitches.

Seen the New Six Flags commercials? The ones with the obviously Asian guy yelling "More Flags! More Fun!". Am I the only one who finds these commercials offensive? Granted they are better than the chick dressed up as the dancing old guy. But still.

I don't like when things go wrong at work. These days it can be prevented. By me.

Thing is if I don't let other people make these mistakes they are not going to learn.

This is frustration beyond belief for me. Letting someone fall on their face and then saying, "So, what'd you learn?" is almost impossible for me to do when what they are making mistakes on are things that are formerly my responsibility. My instinct is to walk around saying Did you do this yet? How about this? What about this? I am totally a mother hen. And it's got to stop.

However sitting on my hands is not a talent I have. As such, I am going to Fanueil Hall tomorrow during my lunch purse hunting. Or maybe dress shopping at Macy's. Not sure yet, we'll see how the day goes.

What it gets me away from my desk AND hopefully finds me something pretty.

P.S. Colonel is a BITCH to spell. I had to google army ranks to copy and paste it above.

P.P.S. - NPH on million dollar password - awesome!

Gloucester pregnancy pact or not, there seems to be a lot of finger pointing at the girls and the school. Um, what about the parents and the boys of the supposed conservative close knit Catholic town? Are they partly to blame? Or perhaps could have helped prevent the issue. Huh, huh, huh?

Also, the FNG who is gone this week, will be back next week. Why God? Why? He's not there now, we're doing just fine, we don't NEED him. And I know after 7 work days out from work FNG is not going to remember a damn thing and I sure as hell am not teaching him again. I am so upset about the fact he is coming back I already organized the back hallway, washed all the dishes (before I made dinner Kevin did the ones from dinner) and went grocery shopping. Need to feel in control me? Never.

I still hate the grocery store. It's so much better when going with someone else.

Ahhh...a breeze running through the house, a hot cup of coffee in my hand, and the whrilling dervish that is my mother doing half a million things before I even get up. Yup it's a summer morning on the Cape and I am loving it.

No huge plans yet. I am going to go for a run after my coffee, my aunt and uncle aren't here yet, the Debbies are doing some home improvement for my mother and I just might have to kick my husbands ass at mini golf.

There's a lot "wrong" in my life right now, but on days like today I have to rememeber there's a lot right with it too.

We are shopping for grills for the up coming party, they only seem to come in wee and FRECKIN' HUGE. We are on the hunt for not-so-wee and can't seem to find any at a store that will also assemble it for free or a fee.

What? You think I am a wuss? A princess? A unmechanical chick who just wants things to work? Well yeah me, but me and Kevin plus gas lines we think equals explodey. Yeah, we're having it assembled, thankyouverymuch.

So the Celtics parade is a block away from the buliding I work in in Downtown Crossing. Why do I have the feeling I am going to be the only one working tomorrow at noon or so.

Must bring in lunch tomorrow - don't want to go outside and deal with the fans.

I was in a company sponsored class today. It was packed, the largest class I have taken at work by far. The course is an overview of the entire securities industry so with all the backgrounds in the class, finance, IT, marketing the level has to be rather low but it is BROAD. Suffice it to say I had no idea there were so many security types. BE that as it may, there were all sorts of people in this class. There were even two VPs. How they became VPs without knowing the industry is a topic of conversation for later.

What I did notice was I think I was the ONLY one in the class who didn't check a crackberry during the breaks and lunch and class and while in the bathroom. Okay, maybe not the last one. In a class of 26 I think there were over 12 people with Crackberries, I have not seen such a density before. And with all the buzzing and beeping that was going on in the class I don't think I should get one. I'd never get anything done. Ever. But sigh...I still want one.

In other news interleague play sucks.

Stephen Sondheim is not at the Tony's!??!?!?!?!??!??!?!?!?

WHAT!??!!??!??!?!?!?

He's not there. He got a LIFETIME ACHIEVEMENT AWARD and Inigo Montoya reads a letter from him?

Really? Really?!

Sigh....

A Happy happy Birthday goes out to secretlifeof_em!

Hello there. I am around this week. Just not posting for whatever reason that I can't quite figure out.

Work is work. I am slowly but surely getting out on time these days. Mostly becuase I am making it a priority and there is a lot less work on my desk. There's a lot I could say about the state of my mind about my work, however I would rather dwell on, if this is the state of my desk for the summer - I'll take it. It may be boring, but it gets me out at a decent hour while the sun is shining letting me make hey.

I just wish I could break my attitude of late. The new guy (who is not the newest guy as we have an intern for the summer!) is still SLOW. I swear, I want to do some classic General Relativity experiments around his desk as it feels like time dilation does in fact happen the closer I go to it. Add to the fact that he is about a foot taller than I am, there IS some length contraction as well. Either way, he's slow. He's getting the stuff but on such a snails pace I am wondering if it's even worth it anymore. But his pacing is what pisses me off so much and I just can't let it go. I have to - I don't know how. At least I know there is a problem and it's on my end.

New things abound in my life this week. Tonight was celebrating Gina's birthday with new and old friends, making it into a late night, but a fun one nonetheless. Last night was going to a new pilates class, that the more I think about it the more I liked it. Granted the instructor is pregnant and looks better than I do and moved at a pace that I could barley keep up with still I signed up for six more. I figure I'll see if I like it for six weeks and see what the results are like to figure out my next step. Because damn it I am not buying new pants in a larger size.

(Weird, I talk about the pace of two different things, and being on both sides of the issue and while I understand that the instructor will go fast I do not plan on keeping up with her, perhaps this is what new guy has choosen to do with me. Ah, the other shoe...)

I guess if I can't change things up at work right now changing them up at home and in life is the best thing/only thing I can do. For someone who hates change I guess doing on my own terms is at least being able to control what is going on somewhat. And it's the only thing that is going to get me out of this rut.

Also in baseball news, the Cape League started tonight and it looks like Joba got his first and six innings as a starter. Now I am going to have two baseball articles to read on a daily basis. Yea yea yea woe is me huh?

I'm off to bed. I am hanging out with sooz617 for a show and dinner on Newbury Street tomorrow! Comfy shoes a must!

Oh and tonight's quote for those from or that have lived in western NY: "What's a Wegmans? Does it sell shoes?"

AND - I take a lot of photos of food.

To some Sunday is a day of worship. For others it's a hangover day or a laundry day or family day. For me since about March, Sunday has been the worst day of the week no matter my plans.

Ugh. I dread going to work. So much so that getting up on Sunday knowing that I have less than 24 hours before I have to go back downtown is just as bad as getting up on Monday morning. In fact, it might be harder to get up becuase I get up so bloody early on the week days I am not really conscious until I get to the bus stop.

This mind set is killing me, my good habits, and my ability to get things done. All I have done today is sit on the couch watching TV trying to make myself DO something. Of course this leads me to do the one easy thing - eat. Which combined with all the not going to the gym I am doing has been great for my body. Or not.

Is this how I am going to feel every Sunday for the rest of my life? This is not what it's supposed to be right? Time will change and Sundays won't always feel like this right?

All I know is I have got to get out of this rut.

Kevin came home with fire roses for me today. (I'm calling them fire roses because they are red and yellow.) They are in the kitchen and are lovely.

I ran 3.07 miles in 36 mins with malpa14 tonight.

Thus, I am going to chalk today in the good day side of things.

Two great tastes that taste great together.

Have you seen this on abcnews.com? It's a photo of a family and their weekly food in different places in the world. And it's awesome. Oh it's from a book Hungary Planet

Part of me wants to do this for myself. I write down everything I eat (or I should) I think it would be an interesting proposition and project.

There are several things floating around in my mind today:

1. Saw someone on the way home with a "Free Tibet" license plate frame. You know nothing says I care about a cause as a middle class American who is so privileged beyond belief and my own understanding than a license plate frame pushing a cause, huh? (yea I totally fall into this category...)

2. I have made a decision: The MINUTE I find out that Hilary is out of the race and announcing she is I am writing a check to the DNC, but not until that moment are they getting one red cent from me. And depending on how long it takes her to bow out, I may implement an exponentially sliding scale to the amount I am donating. It's my little protest, enjoy it with me won't you?
Edit Apparently the DNC just read LJ, they're still only getting 37.96, she's bowing out on Friday!

3. Work was work today. It's different but the same at the same time. And the same parts are the daily aggravations that I contend with. This can't be a good sign can it.

RRRRRRRRRGGGGGGGGGGGGHHHHHHHHHHHHH!

That's it. I don't care what it is going do to my sleep schedule. I am taking a nap.